The Best Friend…

Sometimes life has unexpected turns. The ‘wrong’ person is elected to office. We feel abandoned by those we thought would be there for us. A person we counted on as a friend, betrays us. Does this story sound familiar? Does it sound like yours? It might be, but I’m thinking of someone in history. A person that everyone thought would be a political rescuer, but then he was taken away, because those in power thought he was a fake and his best friends betrayed and abandoned him.

I know some people who have felt upset their candidate didn’t win the last presidential election, but there are others that feel theirs did. Is either one wrong? No, they just have different perspectives. I’m not going to choose one or make this political either, so don’t hold your breath. God can use any man or woman to get the outcome he wants. What he needs are people praying for those in leadership.

1 Timothy 2:1-2 I urge you, first of all, to pray for all people. Ask God to help them; intercede on their behalf, and give thanks for them. Pray this way for kings and all who are in authority so that we can live peaceful and quiet lives marked by godliness and dignity.

I have been betrayed by friends, and it hurts to the core. I had one friend of over a decade, who insisted I said something I didn’t. She wouldn’t listen to anything contrary to what she perceived, even though our conversation was in writing. How do you convince someone who puts words in your mouth that you never said, but what they think? When they’re accusing you of words in their mind, without any credibility? You don’t, because they’re operating out of a stubborn mindset that has turned against you.

So how do you handle the hurt they’ve caused you? “Let it go and let God” is the best advice I can offer. You never know why they treated you the way they did or what they might be dealing with internally, or in their private lives. They may be struggling with sin or hurt you can’t imagine. So let God heal and/or judge them and move on.

But I say to you, Love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you. Matthew 5:44

Perhaps you’ve been or feel abandoned by your spouse, your parents, or a friend. I’m sorry for your hurt, but I know someone who can heal that hurt. It’s time to make friends with the best friend a person can have — Jesus. When I was single, several years ago, I moved to a new town. I had a very deep relationship with Jesus, he was and still is my best friend. I had a man ask me, who wanted to date me, “What are you looking for in a man?” I told him, “I’m not looking for a man, I have the only man I need in my life, his name is Jesus.” I wasn’t joking either. When we get to really know Jesus as a close personal friend, he becomes our everything. All the names you hear him described as, he is! He is our friend who sticks closer than a brother. He will never leave us, he told us that in his word and if you believe his word, then you should believe that he is always available. How is that for friendship?!

Hebrews 13:5 For God has said, “I will never fail you. I will never abandon you.”

Deuteronomy 31:8 Do not be afraid or discouraged, for the LORD will personally go ahead of you. He will be with you; he will neither fail you nor abandon you.”

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So, who in history has experienced all of these things and far greater heartache than we have? Jesus! The same Jesus who will never leave us, has been betrayed! He has been abandoned by his friends, he may have felt abandoned by his Father for a second, even though he knew his purpose. And though he was the King of Kings, (an unelected office) the religious leaders were too caught up in their own money scheming and greed to see him as the Messiah standing right before them! Would you recognize him today? I know we all think we would. The disciples were with him all the time and still had a problem recognizing him. We all think we are so dedicated in our hearts that we would never deny him like Peter did, or betray him like Judas for 30 pieces of Silver, or doubt him like Thomas, or not know him walking along the road to Emmaus, or mistake him for a gardener like Mary Magdalene did after he had risen? Would any of them be us? Or would we mistake him as a stranger?

What do we put before Jesus? Have we betrayed him by not believing in some part of his word? Parts that we aren’t quite comfortable with or don’t understand? Have we abandoned him by not spending time with him? Ouch! Got me there. Have we not made him the leader of our lives? Have we looked to religious leaders and political leaders as our saviors instead?

I pray that you make Jesus your leader and your best friend today. You won’t feel betrayed or abandoned or let down. Let him lead you as it says in Matthew:

Matthew 11:28-30 “Are you tired? Worn out? Burned out on religion? Come to me. Get away with me and you’ll recover your life. I’ll show you how to take a real rest. Walk with me and work with me-watch how I do it. Learn the unforced rhythms of grace. I won’t lay anything heavy or ill-fitting on you. Keep company with me and you’ll learn to live freely and lightly.”

Is Projecting Constructive or Destructive?

What is projection? Projection is when we take a behavior and transfer it over to another situation. There are several applications to projection. For instance, if we have a low self image because of our weight, height, or intellect, etc., we might find someone we deem inferior to us and then put them down in an effort to make ourselves feel better. While this may sound like a negative way to boost self image, people do it every day. Gossip is a form of putting others down. How does bullying start? Because one person feels inferior to another for some reason. Perhaps they were made fun of by their peers, siblings, or sadly, their parents. Instead of being the victim, they later victimize others.

Another form of projection is to think that others should take up the same causes that you have. If you’re all for sheep eating green grass, then everyone else should be, right? If you believe that the version of Bible you read or your church is the right one, then everyone else should also, right? That’s a projection of arrogance and superiority. That line of thinking says that you are the only one who thinks correctly and promotes you as perfect. Others perceive you to be haughty and overbearing and you don’t understand why they don’t see things your way. Sound familiar? I’ve been there before. On some issues, I still am, but I try to be open-minded, while still staying grounded in the Word, led by the Holy Spirit. That is the crux of life as a Christian. It is who Jesus Christ left us, the Holy Spirit to guide us into all truth. But are we truly listening? Are we being guided? Did we hear the Holy Spirit tell us to argue with others? Let’s see, the Holy Spirit’s character is to comfort, to bring forth truth, to establish peace. No, I don’t think the Holy Spirit ever told me to argue with a friend or family member.

Then one of the ways projection hurts Christianity the most is by those who project their own mindset, their own thoughts, or the actions of others towards them on God and on Christians in general. Because, somewhere, someone professing to be a Christian hurt them and they decided ‘how could Christianity be real? How could God be real? How could God love me if I have these thoughts? How can I trust another ‘Christian?’ How can I trust another church?’ Well, here’s my answer, 1. God did NOT cause any bad things to happen to you! He didn’t give you or anyone else bad thoughts! God is LOVE! He Loved you so much, and everyone else in this world, that he gave up his own son to die and brought him back to life. You may say, ‘Well he knew he was going to bring him back.’ Oh? Why? Because he’s God? So then you Do Believe in God? Because everything within us cries out for our creator and if we nearly die, we cry out to him. Don’t let a near death experience test you to find out. Get off the fence and follow his Son, who was a perfect example of a human being and perfect love. 2. Mankind will fail. There’s not a single person out there who’s not going to disappoint you at some point. There are few, very few Christians who lead a life sold out completely to follow Christ and allow the Holy Spirit to lead them. Everyone has a weakness they won’t relinquish control over. 3. As far as thinking others think like you, there are some people who are not out to hurt you and who have very pure motives. If you’re tuned into the Holy Spirit, you’ll know which ones are pure and who to avoid.

There’s another area of projection I’ve seen Christians do in their walk, that thwarts their spiritual growth. Some Christians may think another believer has more spiritual knowledge than they do, so they belittle the one they deem beyond them. Or perhaps they’re afraid to move forward with God, to take the next step, so they criticize everything another believer says or believes, putting down their church or doctrine.

Jesus wasn’t looking for a set of rules, he came to free us from the law! He wasn’t here to participate in sacraments, traditions or even a church, nor a building, he was looking for true worshippers, whose lives were lived by example, those who would follow him. He wanted those who were led by the Holy Spirit, doing the Father’s will. His “church” was/is not bound by walls, or certain days. If we project anything as Christians, May it be the love of Jesus Christ, faithfulness, gentleness, self- control, grace, compassion, patience, peace, comfort, and joy.

John 4:23-24 But the time is coming-indeed it’s here now-when true worshipers will worship the Father in spirit and in truth. The Father is looking for those who will worship him that way. For God is Spirit, so those who worship him must worship in spirit and in truth.”

Hebrews 8:1-2 Here is the main point: We have a High Priest who sat down in the place of honor beside the throne of the majestic God in heaven. There he ministers in the heavenly Tabernacle, the true place of worship that was built by the Lord and not by human hands.

Christian (with Alter Ego)

Those who belong to Christ Jesus have nailed the passions and desires of their sinful nature to his cross and crucified them there. Since we are living by the Spirit, let us follow the Spirit’s leading in every part of our lives. — Galatians 5:24-25 NLT

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I find that many ‘Christians’ live antithetical lives in many facets of their lives. They live one way at work, one way with their buddies, another way with their families or at home, and still have another personality to take to church. What an exhausting life they must lead keeping all of these alter-egos intact! How can you say that you are saved and believe in Jesus Christ and live like the world lives? Of course, we then could argue whether these self-proclaimed ‘Christians’ have truly experienced a life-changing salvation or true repentance. But we all see it, the co-worker that behaves pristinely at work and goes home and gives their family hell. Or those who go out boozing and partying during the week but turn up to church stone-cold sober. Then there are the ones who watch shows (Uh-oh, I’m gonna step on toes here…) full of debauchery, satanic fantasy, murder, and hatred towards their friends & family. I’m speaking of the shows full of illicit sex, adultery, vampires, zombies, and horror. How can anyone who is truly sold out to God watch them? How can darkness co-mingle with light? How do they not have nightmares? … Actually, some have confessed to me that they do. Then they expect God’s peace? Christ said he would give us peace. If he left us the Holy Spirit, our comforter, our peace, aren’t we negating it by viewing these shows? The Bible says if we belong to Christ we have nailed our passions and desires to the cross, but if we are consuming garbage, aren’t we nailing Christ back to the Cross? I probably lost a few of you at this point, but for those who are brave enough to read on, the Bible puts it in plain text:

Don’t copy the behavior and customs of this world, but let God transform you into a new person by changing the way you think. Then you will learn to know God’s will for you, which is good and pleasing and perfect. Romans 12:2 NLT

It is obvious what kind of life develops out of trying to get your own way all the time: repetitive, loveless, cheap sex; a stinking accumulation of mental and emotional garbage; frenzied and joyless grabs for happiness; trinket gods; magic-show religion; paranoid loneliness; cutthroat competition; all-consuming-yet-never-satisfied wants; a brutal temper; an impotence to love or be loved; divided homes and divided lives; small-minded and lopsided pursuits; the vicious habit of depersonalizing everyone into a rival; uncontrolled and uncontrollable addictions; ugly parodies of community. I could go on. This isn’t the first time I have warned you, you know. If you use your freedom this way, you will not inherit God’s kingdom. Galatians 5:19-21 The Message

You may be asking, “how is it possible to know the ways of God or to do what is right?” We cannot do it of our own will. Sure there are people in this world who are ‘godly’ who live nearly unblemished lives by the world’s standards. But there is nobody that is perfect and there is nobody who can know God’s ways without the guidance of the Holy Spirit. The only way we can live a truly Christ-centered life is to submit to the guidance of the Holy Spirit in our lives daily. It is a choice but the more we make that choice, it becomes a habit. It becomes our new nature. Christ said the Holy Spirit would lead us in truth. It is not sin-consciousness, but God-cognizance that will lead us into living a holier life. When we are not focused on the sins , but instead are focused on God, we have no desire to follow after sin. To know God more and better is to become more like Jesus and the example he set for us.

He is the Holy Spirit, who leads into all truth. The world cannot receive him, because it isn’t looking for him and doesn’t recognize him. But you know him, because he lives with you now and later will be in you. John 14:17 NLT

He did this so that the just requirement of the law would be fully satisfied for us, who no longer follow our sinful nature but instead follow the Spirit. Those who are dominated by the sinful nature think about sinful things, but those who are controlled by the Holy Spirit think about things that please the Spirit. So letting your sinful nature control your mind leads to death. But letting the Spirit control your mind leads to life and peace. Romans 8:4-6 NLT (my emphases)