Capture Their Hearts

As I was praying for a loved one, I prayed for God to arrest their soul and then I thought how odd that sounds. But it is not off-base. Paul wrote and corrected the Corinthians that we must break down every stronghold of reasoning a person has to not believe in God. We don’t do it by pounding them with arguments or force, but by sound teaching. We give them convincing truths that show the doctrine of their life is led by deception and we do so in love. We show them the fallacies in their choices when the opportunity arises, but always in meekness and love.

2 Corinthians 10:4-5 We use God’s mighty weapons, not worldly weapons, to knock down the strongholds of human reasoning and to destroy false arguments. We destroy every proud obstacle that keeps people from knowing God. We capture their rebellious thoughts and teach them to obey Christ.

Many times people get caught up in causes or ideas that consume them and keep them from the purpose of life in general, which is knowing Christ. If they don’t have a personal relationship with him, then the cares of this world, no matter how worthy, can distract them from seeking out God. I have even seen Christians sacrifice time fellowshipping with God to work on a cause they’re passionate about. The problem with this, is without communion or time spent with God and guidance from the Holy Spirit, they eventually burn out. There is nothing in this world that can satisfy us more than our relationship with our Heavenly Father and communing with Him.

Colossians 2:8 Don’t let anyone capture you with empty philosophies and high-sounding nonsense that come from human thinking and from the spiritual powers of this world, rather than from Christ.

So when I prayed for God to arrest their soul, what I meant was I wanted him to gain their full attention, so that they would see their need for Him and a relationship. But until they believe in him and receive him, they may not pay attention to our words. This is where our prayers are more powerful than a loved one’s words to them, because God is able to use others to open their hearts. Once that seed is planted, it will grow and eventually blossom. I pray he captures the hearts of those who don’t believe or who have turned their backs on God. I pray that he might send someone who with a simple phrase or action that might open their minds and hearts to Him.

Song of Songs 4:9 You have captured my heart, my treasure, my bride. You hold it hostage with one glance of your eyes, with a single jewel of your necklace.

In the verse from Song of Songs, if the church as a whole is the bride and Jesus is the bridegroom, then we must remember we already have captured his heart. With one glance towards him, a cry out to him, or one tear – one ‘jewel’ he is there for us.

Think of how even the disciples, who intimately knew Jesus, did not recognize him as he walked down the road with them, after his death on the cross. He appeared to them as a stranger because they were still caught up in their grief. What are we caught up in that we might not recognize his presence in our lives now? Their hope was gone and they had given up. Yet later, they realized he was alive and sought him out and found him with the other disciples breaking bread! It can be that way for every lost person!!

Luke 24:32 And they said one to another, Did not our heart burn within us, while he talked with us by the way, and while he opened to us the scriptures?

May their hearts come alive to the word of God, may he capture their hearts.

What does the Bible say about Toxic people?

Yes, I started to write that article, the one in the title. I was going to look up what God says about toxic people, but it’s pretty much summed up in the following verses found in the Amplified version of Proverbs 6, verses 16-19.

These six things the Lord hates; Indeed, seven are repulsive to Him: A proud look [the attitude that makes one overestimate oneself and discount others], a lying tongue, And hands that shed innocent blood, A heart that creates wicked plans, Feet that run swiftly to evil, A false witness who breathes out lies [even half-truths], And one who spreads discord (rumors) among brothers.

toxic

But the more I thought about it, I didn’t want to focus on the negative, because that’s what toxic people do. They focus on every negative bit of news they can find on someone, discounting the good; they gossip, they tell white lies (which are lies), they run to spread bad news and plan evil, no matter the consequences. 

So I looked at the flip side. There are far more verses on what the righteous mean to God, which to me says… if the Bible focuses on righteous living, then it is far more important than what those who are living in sin are doing. Do you know why? Because, through Jesus death, burial, and resurrection he wiped out sin. Those who come to repentance and turn from their wicked ways and truly repent, will have a change of heart. That is the sign of a true believer, one who worships him in spirit and in truth. 

And I will give you a new heart, and I will put a new spirit in you. I will take out your stony, stubborn heart and give you a tender, responsive heart. – Ezekiel 36:26
No, a true Jew is one whose heart is right with God. And true circumcision is not merely obeying the letter of the law; rather, it is a change of heart produced by the Spirit. And a person with a changed heart seeks praise from God, not from people. Romans 2:29
Don’t copy the behavior and customs of this world, but let God transform you into a new person by changing the way you think. Then you will learn to know God’s will for you, which is good and pleasing and perfect. Romans 12:2

True repentance and acceptance as Christ as our Savior changes our hearts and minds. We have no desire to harm others. We only have a desire to please God and to live a life that pleases him, not other people. We also don’t worry, because we know he will take care of our needs.

And if God cares so wonderfully for wildflowers that are here today and thrown into the fire tomorrow, he will certainly care for you. Why do you have so little faith? “So don’t worry about these things, saying, ‘What will we eat? What will we drink? What will we wear?’ These things dominate the thoughts of unbelievers, but your heavenly Father already knows all your needs. Seek the Kingdom of God above all else, and live righteously, and he will give you everything you need. Matthew 6:30-33

I love this verse in Isaiah because it is an example of realization, when we understand God’s great love for us.

I delight greatly in the Lord; my soul rejoices in my God. For he has clothed me with garments of salvation and arrayed me in a robe of his righteousness, as a bridegroom adorns his head like a priest, and as a bride adorns herself with her jewels. Isaiah 61:10

What love he bestows on those who live a righteous life and treat others as they would like to be treated. I end this by encouraging you to read Proverbs 16.

 

How do You Define Family?

Family is a unit of people who support each other. God created family for relationship with himself and with each other. Family synonyms: inheritance, relationship, people. Family is a group of people affiliated either by birth, by marriage, or by sharing, nurturing, accepting, and respecting each other. There are clear guidelines to what God doesn’t want in a family and what he does. Starting with the positive verses first and then the behaviors we should avoid. If we follow what God intended, it would encompass those who work together as one unit. By God’s definition, as a church or family, we are one body and in marriage, we become one person. The Bible tells us we each have a role to play:

The human body has many parts, but the many parts make up one whole body. So it is with the body [family] of Christ. Some of us are Jews, some are Gentiles, some are slaves, and some are free. But we have all been baptized into one body by one Spirit, and we all share the same Spirit… Love is patient and kind. Love is not jealous or boastful or proud or rude. It does not demand its own way. It is not irritable, and it keeps no record of being wronged. It does not rejoice about injustice but rejoices whenever the truth wins out. Love never gives up, never loses faith, is always hopeful, and endures through every circumstance. 1 Corinthians 12:12-13 & 13:4-7

“‘For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh’; so then they are no longer two, but one* flesh. Therefore what God has joined together, let not man separate.” Mark 10:7-9

family

We are also told there are things that God detests in any family:

There are six things the Lord hates—no, seven things he detests:
haughty eyes,
a lying tongue,
hands that kill the innocent,
a heart that plots evil,
feet that race to do wrong,
a false witness who pours out lies,
a person who sows discord in a family. Proverbs 6:16-19

But to focus on individual families, such as parents, whose kids grow up and marry, eventually having kids of their own, then become grandparents… Where does God tell us to stand in this role? We’ve raised them the best we could, now it’s their turn. Do we continue to give advice? ‘No, not unless they ask, and then as led by the Holy Spirit. IF we put in our two cents, we must remember that it is only two cents, compared to their 98 cents – meaning they must make their own decisions!” We need to greet their decisions with open minds, not interference. The only exception would be, if they’re in a dangerous situation. Other than that, we should be hands off! We should embrace their spouse and make them feel comfortable and part of ‘the family’ — never an outsider. I call my children’s spouses ‘in-loves’ because their relationship goes deeper than a law or sheet of paper they signed. It is a commitment they’ve made; with God. This is where the peeling away of resistance comes into play. We must accept their decision, even if and when we don’t agree. Fortunately, I agree with my kid’s decisions in mates.

God spoke in the Old Testament of being circumcised to be part of his family. Under the New Testament or Grace, this would be circumcision of the heart, the peeling away of the layers of our heart that have hardened to anyone we didn’t choose for our kids; being open to those outside the family, by accepting them for who they are, not who we want them to be. Families accept not just their blood family, but also their children’s spouses. They don’t interfere by trying to influence their children against their partners by pointing out perceived flaws. 

For you are not a true Jew just because you were born of Jewish parents or because you have gone through the ceremony of circumcision. No, a true Jew is one whose heart is right with God. And true circumcision is not merely obeying the letter of the law; rather, it is a change of heart produced by the Spirit. And a person with a changed heart seeks praise from God, not from people. Romans 2:28-29 & Ephesians 2:11

As Jesus was speaking to the crowd, his mother and brothers stood outside, asking to speak to him. Someone told Jesus, “Your mother and your brothers are standing outside, and they want to speak to you.” Jesus asked, “Who is my mother? Who are my brothers?” Then he pointed to his disciples and said, “Look, these are my mother and brothers. Anyone who does the will of my Father in heaven is my brother and sister and mother!” Matthew 12:46-50

In the second verse, Jesus turned the verse around to those questioning him and said anyone who did the will of God is his family. Therefore by his view, there wasn’t anyone outside his family unless they didn’t follow God. So, how do we view “outsiders” in our family? Do we view them as those who follow God as being in our family or are they outsiders if they aren’t born into our family? Do we accept others or view them as foreigners? If they have children from a previous marriage, are their children truly part of the family or do we label them as ‘the former spouse’s kids?’ Do we treat them equally as our grandkids or do we give the “natural” grandkids preferential treatment? It doesn’t matter how they came into the family, and neither should the current spouse of our children, they should be embraced and accepted, just as we accept our OWN children, without preferential treatment and without prejudice.

Are we willing to accept our children’s decisions in choosing a spouse? Or do we think we know better than they; who is suited for them? If we don’t accept them, isn’t that a reflection on what we view as important? If we’re opposed to their decisions, perhaps our children have chosen someone diametrically opposed to our views and it’s alien to our thinking. Maybe our kids are tired of how we act and want to find someone with a different attitude. Perhaps it’s time to search our own souls instead of trying to find something wrong with their mate or find fault with our own children. Our opposition may require a little personal soul searching instead of attacks on their selection. Perhaps we should just embrace their decisions and keep peace in the family, instead of making their marriage difficult. 

How are we contributing to our own family? How are we contributing to our church family or the community family? Are we making a positive influence in each situation, or do we feel that if we make a positive influence at church, we don’t need to at home? The family influence starts in our homes. If we aren’t making a positive influence in our own home family, we aren’t effective at church family or in our own community. Have you met people who complain about their role at home, or all the volunteer work they do at church? It gets wearisome just listening to them. Jesus said take my yoke upon you, cease from our labors, and allow the Holy Spirit to work through us, at home, in church, and in the community. We need to submit to the leadership of God through Christ via the Holy Spirit. But the best way we can help our grown children is by staying out of their lives and accepting them. It is by not interfering. It is by setting good examples. The only example they or we should be following is the example of Christ. The only inheritance that matters is our inheritance of eternal life. When that is our focus and not what worldly goods we leave when we’re gone, or who we give preference to, then we’ll have peace in our families. But we must allow the Holy Spirit to guide us in our daily lives, each hour.

God has now revealed to us his mysterious will regarding Christ—which is to fulfill his own good plan. And this is the plan: At the right time he will bring everything together under the authority of Christ—everything in heaven and on earth. Furthermore, because we are united with Christ, we have received an inheritance from God, for he chose us in advance, and he makes everything work out according to his plan. God’s purpose was that we Jews who were the first to trust in Christ would bring praise and glory to God. And now you Gentiles have also heard the truth, the Good News that God saves you. And when you believed in Christ, he identified you as his own by giving you the Holy Spirit, whom he promised long ago. The Spirit is God’s guarantee that he will give us the inheritance he promised and that he has purchased us to be his own people [family]. He did this so we would praise and glorify him. Ephesians 1:9-14

We were chosen by God–the entire family of God, which is those who follow Him.

 

*Note: My emphasis in Mark 10