Author: Kimberly

free lance photographer, jewelry designer, writer, gardener, & seamstress

Facing the Unexpected 

Jesus had just healed many people and the disciples had witnessed these events. Afterwards, they got in a boat and SUDDENLY a storm came up and they woke Jesus up because they were frightened. But Jesus was right there with them!! After all the miracles they witnessed, they were worried about the storm! Jesus rebuked the storm. Again, SUDDENLY, while Jesus was in their presence or they were in His, everything calmed. 


 After Peter denied Jesus three times, before his crucifixion, SUDDENLY, he remembered the prophecy spoken over him and he was convicted. But Jesus had already forgiven him.

When the news of Jesus birth was being announced to the shepherds, an angel SUDDENLY appeared, but the angel reassured them that everything was okay.

After Jesus’ resurrection, he appeared to two of the disciples on the road to Emmaeus. Even not knowing who he was, they begged him to stay with them and he accepted. When he broke the bread, SUDDENLY, they recognized him. Later, Jesus SUDDENLY appeared to the disciples and frightened them, he offered them the comfort of the Holy Spirit. 

In another story on the lake, the disciples SUDDENLY saw Jesus walking on the water, and they were frightened. He told them to have peace and remain calm.

When Saul (later Paul) was on the road to Damascus, he SUDDENLY saw a light so bright it knocked him to the ground and a voice spoke to him. That voice was Jesus, who asked him to quit persecuting him. Saul was blinded by the light, but was at peace and still walked the rest of the way with guidance. Jesus was with him in spirit! His sight was returned when he believed.

After Paul survived the shipwreck, he came to an island and built a fire. A poisonous snake bit him and the islanders expected him to SUDDENLY die. When he didn’t, they thought he was a god, but he actually had Jesus with him, protecting him. 
In each of these stories, people were frightened. Sometimes it was those who already believed and some were non-believers, but Jesus was ALWAYS PRESENT during the SUDDENLY times, which interpreted from the Greek, means the UNEXPECTED TIMES. What unexpected things have happened in your life lately that have thrown a wrench in your plans or may have frightened you? Has it been financial, your health, a legal dispute, or a family situation? Or perhaps it’s been all of them and more. Just because they’ve happened, doesn’t mean that Jesus is not right there beside us. When we forget to recognize Jesus and rely on him, we let our fears and emotions overtake us. 

Personally, we’ve had many trials in our lives this year in each of the areas I mentioned and multiple times in many scenarios. Thankfully, we’ve had the wisdom to hold onto ktnowing that none of this means God doesn’t love and care for us. It doesn’t mean he has forgotten us and because of all these calamities, we’ve grown. 

Hopefully we can say after having endured, what Paul told the Corinthians, May Jesus give us Paul’s outlook and viewpoint as we press forward. Holy Spirit, work this heart in us, during the unexpected and sudden trials. 

2 Corinthians 6:3-10 (excerpt) We live in such a way that no one will stumble because of us, and no one will find fault with our ministry… we show that we are true ministers of God. We patiently endure troubles and hardships and calamities of every kind… endured sleepless nights … We prove ourselves by our purity, our understanding, our patience, our kindness, by the Holy Spirit within us, and by our sincere love. We faithfully preach the truth. God’s power is working in us. We use the weapons of righteousness in the right hand for attack and the left hand for defense. We serve God whether people honor us or despise us, whether they slander us or praise us. We are honest, but they call us impostors. We are ignored, even though we are well known. We live close to death, but we are still alive. We have been beaten [with words]… Our hearts ache, but we always have joy… we give spiritual riches to others. We own nothing, and yet we have everything.

Comfort and New Life

Some of the reasons, it’s so hard to lose a parent, sibling, cousin, or close friend, are because they hold so many memories of us that nobody else does. 

In a perfect world, our parents were there the day we were born, if not both, at least our mother. They hold the memory of how we came into the world. Even adopted children wonder how they were conceived and why they were given up for adoption. Were they not wanted? Could their parents not afford them? Were there extenuating circumstances? Everyone wants someone to want them, to need them. Even a child who was unplanned can still be wanted and loved. Just because they may have been an “accidental pregnancy” doesn’t make them any less loved or wanted. It only means they weren’t part of the parents original plan at that time, but they were God’s. It’s how the parents’ choose to accept them that makes the difference. 

I’ve had two children that came into this world unexpectedly, but they were no less loved than their sibling I planned. Of course I was surprised at first, but I adjusted and was thrilled when they arrived!  Both their pregnancies were easier than the one that was planned, funny how that worked out. 
But we miss our parents so much when they’re gone, because they know things about us that nobody else does, like every scraped knee, every bike wreck, every time we thought there were monsters under our bed or in our closet, they knew all our fears and hopes, (which might change weekly or daily) and they still loved us, no matter how many sleepless nights or how many times we called out to them, because we saw a shadow in the middle of the night. They nurtured us through sicknesses of every kind, they may have missed work or sleep to help us feel better, but they didn’t complain, except about the grief they were given by their employers. Plus, our parents know our lineage, they remember the generations before us and who our grandparents are and who was who in the family tree. Some of them even remember our great or great-great grandparents, which is hard to fathom! They hold this treasure chest of information about our identity tucked away in their heads and when they’re gone, part of our identity is gone also. Who do we call when we want advice on certain things? For me it was usually my mother. I didn’t always take her advice, but I could bounce my ideas and troubles off her and knew I wouldn’t be judged or condemned. I would still be loved, now I rely on God, and he has even more unconditional love. He also knows things about me my mother never did. 

Luke 12:7 And the very hairs on your head are all numbered. So don’t be afraid; you are more valuable to God than a whole flock of sparrows.

God knows those things my siblings, cousins, and friends knew… Some of those things your parents never knew, because you were either afraid or embarrassed to tell them. They knew your silly antics, your fears, your desires, your confessions, and some of your deepest secrets, that you couldn’t share with your parents. So when any of them pass from this earth, they take those secrets and memories, those crazy shenanigans you shared with them and nobody else. But God still knows those things too. That is why when we lose anyone in our lives, no matter the significance they had, the only one who can bring and give comfort is God. 

May God comfort all who have lost loved ones. May he wrap his loving arms around you today as you read this and envelop you with the happy memories and may he take away the painful ones you have. May he free you from any regrets you shared in your loved one’s life and may he replace it with joy for just knowing them. May he guide and comfort you, so that you may be the person you should be, to all those you meet in the future. May he help you be the best parent, grandparent, aunt or uncle to those in your life and a shining example of his love. God is always looking for new life, whether it’s an infant or an adult who turns their life to Him. May God… Let God.

Psalm 139:13-18 You made all the delicate, inner parts of my body and knit me together in my mother’s womb. Thank you for making me so wonderfully complex! Your workmanship is marvelous-how well I know it. You watched me as I was being formed in utter seclusion, as I was woven together in the dark of the womb. You saw me before I was born. Every day of my life was recorded in your book. Every moment was laid out before a single day had passed. How precious are your thoughts about me, O God. They cannot be numbered! I can’t even count them; they outnumber the grains of sand! And when I wake up, you are still with me!

How do You Define Family?

Family is a unit of people who support each other. God created family for relationship with himself and with each other. Family synonyms: inheritance, relationship, people. Family is a group of people affiliated either by birth, by marriage, or by sharing, nurturing, accepting, and respecting each other. There are clear guidelines to what God doesn’t want in a family and what he does. Starting with the positive verses first and then the behaviors we should avoid. If we follow what God intended, it would encompass those who work together as one unit. By God’s definition, as a church or family, we are one body and in marriage, we become one person. The Bible tells us we each have a role to play:

The human body has many parts, but the many parts make up one whole body. So it is with the body [family] of Christ. Some of us are Jews, some are Gentiles, some are slaves, and some are free. But we have all been baptized into one body by one Spirit, and we all share the same Spirit… Love is patient and kind. Love is not jealous or boastful or proud or rude. It does not demand its own way. It is not irritable, and it keeps no record of being wronged. It does not rejoice about injustice but rejoices whenever the truth wins out. Love never gives up, never loses faith, is always hopeful, and endures through every circumstance. 1 Corinthians 12:12-13 & 13:4-7

“‘For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh’; so then they are no longer two, but one* flesh. Therefore what God has joined together, let not man separate.” Mark 10:7-9

family

We are also told there are things that God detests in any family:

There are six things the Lord hates—no, seven things he detests:
haughty eyes,
a lying tongue,
hands that kill the innocent,
a heart that plots evil,
feet that race to do wrong,
a false witness who pours out lies,
a person who sows discord in a family. Proverbs 6:16-19

But to focus on individual families, such as parents, whose kids grow up and marry, eventually having kids of their own, then become grandparents… Where does God tell us to stand in this role? We’ve raised them the best we could, now it’s their turn. Do we continue to give advice? ‘No, not unless they ask, and then as led by the Holy Spirit. IF we put in our two cents, we must remember that it is only two cents, compared to their 98 cents – meaning they must make their own decisions!” We need to greet their decisions with open minds, not interference. The only exception would be, if they’re in a dangerous situation. Other than that, we should be hands off! We should embrace their spouse and make them feel comfortable and part of ‘the family’ — never an outsider. I call my children’s spouses ‘in-loves’ because their relationship goes deeper than a law or sheet of paper they signed. It is a commitment they’ve made; with God. This is where the peeling away of resistance comes into play. We must accept their decision, even if and when we don’t agree. Fortunately, I agree with my kid’s decisions in mates.

God spoke in the Old Testament of being circumcised to be part of his family. Under the New Testament or Grace, this would be circumcision of the heart, the peeling away of the layers of our heart that have hardened to anyone we didn’t choose for our kids; being open to those outside the family, by accepting them for who they are, not who we want them to be. Families accept not just their blood family, but also their children’s spouses. They don’t interfere by trying to influence their children against their partners by pointing out perceived flaws. 

For you are not a true Jew just because you were born of Jewish parents or because you have gone through the ceremony of circumcision. No, a true Jew is one whose heart is right with God. And true circumcision is not merely obeying the letter of the law; rather, it is a change of heart produced by the Spirit. And a person with a changed heart seeks praise from God, not from people. Romans 2:28-29 & Ephesians 2:11

As Jesus was speaking to the crowd, his mother and brothers stood outside, asking to speak to him. Someone told Jesus, “Your mother and your brothers are standing outside, and they want to speak to you.” Jesus asked, “Who is my mother? Who are my brothers?” Then he pointed to his disciples and said, “Look, these are my mother and brothers. Anyone who does the will of my Father in heaven is my brother and sister and mother!” Matthew 12:46-50

In the second verse, Jesus turned the verse around to those questioning him and said anyone who did the will of God is his family. Therefore by his view, there wasn’t anyone outside his family unless they didn’t follow God. So, how do we view “outsiders” in our family? Do we view them as those who follow God as being in our family or are they outsiders if they aren’t born into our family? Do we accept others or view them as foreigners? If they have children from a previous marriage, are their children truly part of the family or do we label them as ‘the former spouse’s kids?’ Do we treat them equally as our grandkids or do we give the “natural” grandkids preferential treatment? It doesn’t matter how they came into the family, and neither should the current spouse of our children, they should be embraced and accepted, just as we accept our OWN children, without preferential treatment and without prejudice.

Are we willing to accept our children’s decisions in choosing a spouse? Or do we think we know better than they; who is suited for them? If we don’t accept them, isn’t that a reflection on what we view as important? If we’re opposed to their decisions, perhaps our children have chosen someone diametrically opposed to our views and it’s alien to our thinking. Maybe our kids are tired of how we act and want to find someone with a different attitude. Perhaps it’s time to search our own souls instead of trying to find something wrong with their mate or find fault with our own children. Our opposition may require a little personal soul searching instead of attacks on their selection. Perhaps we should just embrace their decisions and keep peace in the family, instead of making their marriage difficult. 

How are we contributing to our own family? How are we contributing to our church family or the community family? Are we making a positive influence in each situation, or do we feel that if we make a positive influence at church, we don’t need to at home? The family influence starts in our homes. If we aren’t making a positive influence in our own home family, we aren’t effective at church family or in our own community. Have you met people who complain about their role at home, or all the volunteer work they do at church? It gets wearisome just listening to them. Jesus said take my yoke upon you, cease from our labors, and allow the Holy Spirit to work through us, at home, in church, and in the community. We need to submit to the leadership of God through Christ via the Holy Spirit. But the best way we can help our grown children is by staying out of their lives and accepting them. It is by not interfering. It is by setting good examples. The only example they or we should be following is the example of Christ. The only inheritance that matters is our inheritance of eternal life. When that is our focus and not what worldly goods we leave when we’re gone, or who we give preference to, then we’ll have peace in our families. But we must allow the Holy Spirit to guide us in our daily lives, each hour.

God has now revealed to us his mysterious will regarding Christ—which is to fulfill his own good plan. And this is the plan: At the right time he will bring everything together under the authority of Christ—everything in heaven and on earth. Furthermore, because we are united with Christ, we have received an inheritance from God, for he chose us in advance, and he makes everything work out according to his plan. God’s purpose was that we Jews who were the first to trust in Christ would bring praise and glory to God. And now you Gentiles have also heard the truth, the Good News that God saves you. And when you believed in Christ, he identified you as his own by giving you the Holy Spirit, whom he promised long ago. The Spirit is God’s guarantee that he will give us the inheritance he promised and that he has purchased us to be his own people [family]. He did this so we would praise and glorify him. Ephesians 1:9-14

We were chosen by God–the entire family of God, which is those who follow Him.

 

*Note: My emphasis in Mark 10